Get Out of the Boat

Have you heard the saying, "You have to get out of the boat  to walk on water"?  Well it is time to get out of the boat.  I have been sitting in the boat where it is safe and have been watching life happen out on the water. After you have been emotinally and spiritually hurt it is hard to get out of the boat and leave that security behind.  Sometimes it is not a bad thing to stay in the boat for a little while in order to mend and heal, to spend time with God and build that relationship without distractions, to seek answers to questions that keep coming up to the forefront of your mind, to find the reassurance that He is always there no matter the given circumstances, to include Him in your decision making, and hold His hand as you step back into the water.

A church hurt is a terrible thing and can break you spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically.  It is difficult to "get back into the swing of things".  There is a mourning period we must go through, because it is like losing a loved one, and actually, you have.  The love for a church and its people is deep, especially if you played a part in the birth and nurtured it in growth.  It is hard to let go and move on.  Enough tears have been shed to cry a river and enough heart wrenching sobs to wake the dead.  A time for mourning is over.  New life has begun.

After 6 months I am finally able to go to church and not become physically ill or spiritually handicap.  The tension has disappeared and brotherly love is coming back as I let the walls begin to collapse ever so slowly to allow fellowship with other christians.  Learning to trust again takes time.  I have sat in the boat watching and praying for signs and answers as to my next move.  Recently, I have felt a pull to get my feet wet again and to jump into the water focused on Jesus and what He has in store for my ministry.  It is an exciting time as I once again exercise my knowledge, bring experience to the table and quench that hunger and thirst for the Word of God.  A need for a new ministry has opened.  God is not done with me yet!

Bad Hair Day

Taken from my journal in 2002.  Kids were 6 & 7

My usual routine when we get home in the afternoon from work and school is to immediately start the laundry and begin dinner.  The kids usually watch TV or play Scooby on the play station. It is kinda like their winding down time. However on this particular day halfway through preparing dinner I heard a mothers worst fear. "SILENCE".  You know when you don't hear them... they are up to something.

I started going from room to room and calling their name.... no answer. I made it around to the master bathroom and discovered a locked door.  At this time I was thinking.... This CANNOT be good. I knocked on the door and told them to unlock it and come out... NOW!....

I heard shuffling, drawers closing, and cabinets shutting, then I heard the doorknob rattle. I took a deep breath trying to prepare myself for who knows what. They came out of the bathroom with all their fingers, toes and hair ... at this point I began to breathe again.

I decided to ask Tyler first "Tyler, "What have ya'll been doing"... his immediate response was... "It wasn't me!" My heart started to beat a little faster again.... "It wasn't me!" is never and I mean never good.

I turned to Myranda, "Myranda, are you going to tell me what happened?"... her response was, "Are you going to spank me?" Now I was really starting to get nervous. She would tell me if I promised not to spank her.... and besides "Tyler dunnit", "Not me!" and of course Tyler responded "uhn-uhn"..

This went on for about 5 minutes. I wanted to give them the opportunity to tell me before finding out myself. About this time our cat walked out of the bathroom.  I looked back at Myranda and Tyler, then I had to do a double take and look at the cat again.  She looked like she had been in a cat fight.... fur was missing... clumps and clumps of fur were missing.... whiskers were missing.

I turned to look at Myranda and Tyler for them to explain why the cat looked like she had the mange......
Myranda said...."Mom, if you hadn't of left the scissors in the bathroom we would have never done it"....(The cat was not harmed during this event, just missing some fur)


There are many things we are tempted with everyday, but just because the temptation is there doesn't mean we are suppose to act upon it.  Just because the scissors were there did not mean we could give the cat a hair cut.  Just because the R rated movie is on TV, doesn't mean we have to watch it and just because there is a nasty song on the radio, doesn't mean we have to listen.  Temptation is all around us, but God always gives us a way out.  It is up to us whether we take Him up on His offer..

A Birthday Missed

The economy has had some tough blows over the past year and not many companies have gone un-affected by this punch in the gut including mine.  We have downsized several times, we have cut back our trucking fleet, we have shut down different terminals and divisions.  As a last resort we have filed a chapter 11 in the hopes that we can become profitable again, pay off our debts and get back into the work force full swing.  The management in our company has been great by expressing a positive outlook and giving words of encouragement to the skeleton crew still there, but there is always that uncertainty in the back of your mind as you push through the day not only trying to do your job but also the jobs you have inherited due to the company downsizing.  Somewhere in the midst of all the chaos we forgot a co-workers birthday and it hurt her deeply.

This co-worker remembers every birthday in our office and helps to organize luncheons on those special days, but we were so busy and distracted with our on "woe is me's" that we forgot hers.

How often do we go through the day so busy and distracted that we forget to thank Jesus for the job we have, the roof over our head, the food on our table, a car to drive and so on.  We get so caught up in our own issues we don't stop to think about the blessings God is constantly giving us and the thankless job He has.  He deserves to be remembered in everything we do, everything we say and all our thoughts.  I'm sure that God is devastated every time we take His gifts and blessings for granted. 

Just like we took our thoughtful co-worker for granted and forgot to thank her for the many selfless deeds by recognizing her birthday, we take Jesus for granted every time our feet hit the floor by forgetting to acknowledge the One who gives us the strength to rise. No matter what the situation or the circumstance, never ever take Jesus out of your day and you will remember to be thankful not only to Him but will overflow to others who have crossed your path and made a difference.